Epic Pop Culture Battles

Time for a classic “who would win in a fight?” post.

I’m taking a series of characters, fictional or non-fictional, from books, TV shows, movies, or real life, and pitting them against each other. Doesn’t matter if the match-ups are totally nonsensical. From a box of random names I wrote down on slips of paper, I pulled out some interesting match-ups. There are some videos on the Internet that do the talking for some, while others are too far out in left field for visual description.

Indiana Jones vs. Zombies

Indiana might survive a fight against zombies for a while, but after he runs out of bullets, the undead would swarm him, his rope proving no use. Of course, what do I know? I’ve never even watched any Indiana Jones movies, but this seems like a no-brainer.

Mario vs. Harry Potter

Mario is much faster and nimble than Harry and doesn’t need long winded spells to attack. He can jump high, shoot fireballs, go down pipes, and turn into Super Mario. And Mario can’t be hurt by spells because he’s animated and has no blood (or so I think). But, as this attempt at a good descriptive video shows, all Harry has to do is turn Mario into a rat and he wins.

Walter White vs. Luke Skywalker

The only things saving Walter White in this battle is his “crazy handful of nothin” explosive mixture and his mad meth making skills (might be able to impress Luke with the blue stuff). Without a light saber to match Luke, he’ll be like the pizza on the roof, flat and roasted. Though, Walter could still run Skywalker over with his Winnebago 😀

Voldemort vs. Bill Gates

Avada Kevadra! Done. Voldemort wins. That’s with a silent “t”, by the way. Unless Bill Gates pays off Voldemort with his money or finds a way to reprogram him, this will be over quick. But I hear that Bill got an intern to do the fight for him, since he’s Bill Gates and can do that. Or he cloned himself. Or replaced himself with Mark Zuckerberg. Voldemort can’t be killed unless all of his horcruxes are found and destroyed so this battle depends on when it is happening in the Harry Potter timeline: at the very end or somewhere in the middle. The wonders a random draw from a box can do.

Batman vs. Superman

And what do you know, a feature film pitting these iconic superheroes against each other is coming out. I have no idea what’s going to happen in the movie, but I believe Superman would win in a fight because he’s got more superpowers.

Here’s the trailer for the movie coming out in 2016:

Rick Grimes vs. Frodo

Seriously? Rick Grimes would totally kick Frodo’s Hobbit butt. The only defense Frodo has is the ring that makes him invisible and sends him into another dimension. Rick’s got tons of ammunition and an entire world of walkers on his side.

Scooby-Doo vs. Spongebob Squarepants

So an animated dog against an animated spongeguy? Tell me how this makes no sense. I suppose if it was happening on land, the dog would win because Spongebob would dry out, while in the water Spongebob would win because dogs can’t breath underwater. But in terms of which character is better, I would go with Spongebob because at least he’s the main character in the show and can speak regular English.

Spider-man vs. a cow

Spider-man wins in a dance off. Nuff said.

Sherlock Holmes vs. Dr. Who

I don’t think this battle could ever be won. Both of these men are as smart, witty, and just plain awesome as the other.  I guess a humorous video will solve things – or not.

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Worlds Colliding.”

Take two main characters from two different books works of art (either fiction or nonfiction) and introduce them to, or have them meet, each other. What would happen next?

London Bridges

Today’s daily prompt required me to think more out of the box than I am used to. Quite a challenge to even think about who to “send a message” across. There were lots of possibilities…but I finally decided on a letter to a fictional friend living in the UK.

To my fellow English friend,

I hope you are doing well all the way across the pond. The United Kingdom, with its union jack waving, seems like a pleasant place to live. Her Majesty the Queen, always so proud and dignified – can you believe she’s been on the throne for SIXTY YEARS?! No disrespect but that makes our maximum of eight look measly and quite ineffective. She’s also the monarch of 15 other countries – so much power for one single being, but quite impressive. Princess Kate is the heir to the throne so – will she occupy it for the next half century or go a different route? I just can not imagine anyone being in power for so long.

Maybe we can share of cup of tea and crumpets someday? I know, that sounds so stereotypical of your culture – just trying to be humorous and build some rapport. Your soccer or football as it is called always intrigues me. When does the season start and end? Or is it an ongoing event? Man United, the ruler of them all, hopefully will be back again to represent the royal, red, and blue since I heard that they weren’t at their best this year.

I love British accents – they are always the best in films for the foe and make a lady seem quite sophisticated, intelligent, and seductive. London, Liverpool, Manchester, York, Nottingham, Newcastle, Bath, Cambridge, Oxford, Southampton – all places of the old world I admire and want to maybe visit one day. It’s okay here in the States, where soulful music can be heard miles around, but I would definitely like to see your country which has so much more history and interesting places to explore. Many famous figures and works have come from your land including Shakespeare, Rudyard Kipling, Charles Dickens, James Bond, Doctor Who, Sherlock Holmes, J.K. Rowling, Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, The Beatles, Sir Elton John, and what is widely known as the easiest language to learn in the world. Red telephone box. Stonehenge. Glorious castles through the ages. These are some of the things that make your homeland quite unique. I only know about your country with what I see on the surface. There is so much more to experience and learn about.


Your friend from the other ‘United’

In Response to the Daily Prompt: Make It Count